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  1. John William Najarian
    July 31, 2014 @ 4:21 pm

    I think your ‘summary’ question is fair, but it must be hard to determine in different individuals, and how they ‘raise the bar’ on pain levels, degredation, etc..? I wonder what percentage of ‘addicts’ are more dependent on the imagined ‘affirmation’ that comes with sex. Please excuse the way i’ve expressed myself, I’m ignorant of, but extremely interested in this subject!

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    • drjenniferweeks
      July 31, 2014 @ 4:51 pm

      John
      This is a very valid question. The name Sex Addiction is a bit of a misnomer when you look at the root of addiction. In my opinion, Sex Addiction truly has nothing to do with sex. It is about a search for connection that often comes from ruptured attachments. One of the core beliefs about sex that many sex addicts have is that sex is love. Sex and love get fused somewhere along the line. Therefore, your thought about an addict becoming dependent on the affirmation from sex is dead on. A downward spiral often ensues. I need sex for validation/love but perhaps feel shameful about my sexual behavior. That fuels my negative self beliefs about being bad and unlovable. Those feelings are intolerable so I try to fill the emotional hole and use sex to do so. The spiral ensues. If I only feel validated or affirmed through sex but feel bad about my behavior, I am bound to escalate both the behaviors and bad feelings. Thanks for your comment. Jennifer

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  2. Donna
    August 22, 2021 @ 1:04 pm

    Your article was helpful to be able to ask questions that can assist with the client’s level of comfort, discomfort, or to evaluate if the client is ashamed of the behavior rather than be uncomfortable with it. Also if there are co occurring disorders such as bipolar, depression, Aspergers these I feel can complicate assessment. Thoughts?

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    • Dr. Jennifer Weeks
      August 29, 2021 @ 10:34 am

      I agree with your thought that co occurring issues can complicate assessment. Anytime we are dealing with sexuality it is a complex process of looking at underlying issues. Could be mental health, relational, societal, religious etc.

      Reply

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