pedophilia - Dr. Jen's Recovery Readings

CSAM on the Dark Web

Dr. Jennifer Weeks — Mon, 27 May 2024 12:00:00 +0000

Those of us in the field know that access to CSAM on the dark web is really only a few clicks away. Despite what many people think, it is pretty easy to access. Many of our CSAM clients were accessing these materials on TOR sites. Despite its frequent use, we really don’t know much about the details of CSAM availability and users on TOR sites.

A Study on CSAM on the Dark Web

An article just published in Scientific Reports, a Nature publication, looked at CSAM materials on TOR sites from both a computer science perspective and a public health perspective.

It is an enlightening study.

CSAM on the Dark Web: What is TOR?

For the unaware, TOR stands for The Onion Router.

It is an communication protocol that provides many layers of obfuscation for its users.

It does this by concealing the origin of the communications, resisting browser fingerprinting and circumventing traffic.

These tools allow for anonymous online hosting. On TOR sites, illegal content proliferates, whether that be CSAM sharing, drug trafficking, or other crimes.

CSAM on the Dark Web Study: The Questions

The authors of this study analyzed content on TOR sites to address the following questions:

How much CSAM is distributed through the TOR network?
What are users seeking and searching for?

They also surveyed the CSAM users to find out information about them.

Finally, they looked at how interventions based on searches might reduce child abuse.

Do you believe you have an online pornography addiction? Take the free Cyber Pornography Addiction Test (CYPAT) and have the results to speak with your therapist.

Statistical Results

The authors used a web crawler from 2018-2023 and found that 1/5^th of all TOR sites share CSAM.
CSAM can also be found on 21 of the 26 top TOR search engines, with four of these search engines actually advertising CSAM.
11.1% of users specifically searched for CSAM using the phrase “child porn” to get there.
When they surveyed the CSAM viewers, 61.6% said they have tried to stop watching it and 48.1% said they went to stop viewing CSAM.
Those CSAM users who were specifically searching for child content were more often searching for content of girls than boys.
More than half of the CSAM explicit searchers are looking for content in the age range of 12 to 16 year olds.

The authors went as far as to recommend that the psychiatric diagnoses of pedophilia and hebephilia be altered to sexual attraction to children under 11 (paedophilic type), attraction to children 11 to 14 (hebephilic) or both.

Who are Tor CSAM users?

The data showed that most of the CSAM users were initially exposed to CSAM when they were children and that more than half of these exposures were accidental.

Based on self report, almost 70% reported that they preferred content of girls to boys.
A very small percentage of individuals preferred content depicting images of infants or toddlers.

Learn more about Primary Prevention and its benefits in these articles:

What are possible online interventions for users of CSAM on the Dark Web?

The study reported that there are three prominent TOR search engines that provide links to self help programs for people who are concerned about their searching of CSAM. A good number of the CSAM viewers said they want to stop viewing the material and most of them have tried to stop at least once.

If so many people want help, why don’t they get help?

Many of the survey respondents stated that they were afraid to get help. Previous research has cited barriers to seeking help including fear of being reported, fear of being stigmatized, shame, and lack of understanding by professionals.

Since people who are using CSAM on TOR seem to want help, it is an area that is ripe for effective intervention. It opens up the question of whether or not more dark web recruitment for anonymous interventions is possible.

Since three websites provide links to self-help programs, why are more not doing so?

Are you a professional looking to stay up-to-date with the latest information on, sex addiction, trauma, and mental health news and research? Or maybe you’re looking for continuing education courses?

Stay up-to-date with all of Dr. Jen’s work through her practice’s newsletter!

My Takeaways from the Study on CSAM on the Dark Web

I really liked this study for two main reasons:

It was a combination of computer science and psychology

I think we know more about the psychology of CSAM users than how and where they get it.

It is often stated in court that someone who views CSAM must really be working hard to find it and view it. Studies like this one show us that it is not very hard to come across the content and more than half of the people who view it first accessed CSAM accidentally.

It Openly Discusses Interventions

It digs into how we can use these TOR sites to let people know there is help available. If they want to stop their behavior, they need to know there are therapists who can help them in a knowledgeable and non-shaming fashion.

I wonder, now, what we can do as a practice to be more active in prevention in this medium.

Reference: Nurmi, J., Paju, A., Brumley, B.B., Insoll, T., Ovaska, A.K., Soloveva, V., Vaaranen-Valkonen, N., Aaltonen, M. & Arroyo, D. (2024). Investigating child sexual abuse material availability, searches, and users on the anonymous Tor network for a public health intervention strategy. Scientific Reports, 14:7849.

Have you found yourself in legal trouble due to your sexual behavior? Seek assistance before the court mandates it, with Sexual Addiction Treatment Services.

Do you feel your sexual behavior, or that of someone you love, is out of control? Then you should consult with a professional.

Are you looking for more reputable data-backed information on sexual addiction? The Mitigation Aide Research Archive is an excellent source for executive summaries of research studies.

The post CSAM on the Dark Web first appeared on Dr. Jen's Recovery Readings.

Help for Minor Attraction

Dr. Jennifer Weeks — Mon, 11 Jul 2022 00:22:30 +0000

Based on science and clinical experience that there are individuals who acknowledge an attraction to children, also known as minor attraction.

What do we Really Know About Minor Attraction?

The most recent science about minor attraction suggests that the age of the people we are attracted to is influenced by our brain structures and not a choice. Many people who have this attraction also have NOT engaged in any behavior with a child. Because they realize that acting on their attraction is never appropriate.

Where can those afflicted by these urges go for help? How do they ensure they never act on these urges or to process their feelings?

Preparing a sentencing report for a minor attracted person? Get the data you need, quickly, with Mitigation Aide.

Where can they go?

Most of the time they do not seek help for fear of what may happen if they disclose this attraction. Because the fear of stigmatization is a real and justified fear.

Many therapists are not trained to help process this form of sexuality. And, worse yet, many refuse to do so.

There have been a few scientific studies of therapists. These studies have found that they hold the same stigma against pedophilia as the general public. So much for non-judgmental!

Where might someone go for treatment who wants to process their minor attraction? While there are therapists out there who are trained to help people process this attraction, these resources are few and far between.

Learn more about Primary Prevention and its benefits in these articles:

Enter: Troubled Desire

Doctors at The Institute of Sexology and Sexual Medicine at Charite-Universitatsmedzin Berlin created Troubled Desire specifically for this purpose. The website provides an anonymous online self-management program for individuals who experience an attraction to children. The University acknowledged that there was a great need for services for individuals who could not find a suitable therapist near them.

The University is practicing Primary Prevention. By providing resources and support for individuals who are attracted to children who have not offended. This means helping people not offend against children in the first place.

Unfortunately, the normal state of affairs is that we engage in secondary prevention. Therefore we help someone not offend AGAIN.

Know someone struggling with minor attraction? I suggest they check out the free, anonymous online course from Troubled Desire.

Have you found yourself in legal trouble due to your sexual behavior? Seek assistance before the court mandates it, with Sexual Addiction Treatment Services.

Do you feel your sexual behavior, or that of someone you love, is out of control? Then you should consult with a professional.

Are you looking for more reputable data-backed information on sexual addiction? The Mitigation Aide Research Archive is an excellent source for executive summaries of research studies.

The post Help for Minor Attraction first appeared on Dr. Jen's Recovery Readings.

You Are Not a Monster: Review of A Long Dark Shadow

Dr. Jennifer Weeks — Fri, 28 Jan 2022 13:56:45 +0000

As a member of the professional community that works with Minor Attracted Persons as well as individuals who have committed sex crimes, I was immediately aware of the controversy surrounding Dr. Allyn Walker and the publication of their book A Long Dark Shadow: Minor-Attracted People and Their Pursuit of Dignity.

This post contains affiliate links. The author or blog owner may earn a commission if you make a purchase using these links.

Dr. Walker is a professor and researcher who focuses on various aspects of human sexuality. The book is the result of a qualitative study they did using interviews of individuals in the MAP community. This research was done in a completely appropriate and professional manner with the full support of their academic institution.

Fallout from A Long Dark Shadow

After an interview discussing the book, Dr. Walker became the subject (or victim) of social media. There was immediate pushback from people at their university stating that they were promoting child abuse or other similar complaints.

The comments went crazy.

This initially resulted in the university placing them on leave. I imagine the hope was that the fervor would die down. Dr. Walker ultimately resigned from their position based on the harassment and death threats they were receiving.

All of this for what? People, who had not read the book, getting upset by assumptions.

People misconstruing Dr. Walker’s statements, which clearly stated that sexual abuse of children is abhorrent and unacceptable, as being supportive of sexual offending. It is because of this controversy that I immediately purchased the book. The topic is of interest but my main motivation for purchase was to support Dr. Walker.

Struggling with excessive sexual thoughts, urges, or activities that are causing you distress? Take the free, online Sexual Symptom Assessment Scale (SSAS) and get a link to share with your therapist.

My Review

I will start this review by saying that if I were ever to write a book about minor attraction, this is the book I would write.

The first thing I felt upon reading it was a great sense of validation.

Yes!

There are other psychology professionals in the world who understand that pedophilia ≠ sexual offending. There are other psychology professionals willing to spread the word.

I am an adjunct professor for a local graduate program as well as an instructor of a law enforcement polygraphy school.

Everyone who has ever had a class with me leaves (hopefully) with a clear understanding of the differences between attraction and behavior and that pedophilia is a sexual attraction and not a behavior AND that there are plenty of people in the world who are attracted to children who never commit a sexual offense.

The Real Research Behind A Long Dark Shadow

The book is based on Dr. Walker’s research which involved extensive interviews with people who identify as minor attracted. These individuals were brave enough to come forward to a psychology professional, who they often duly distrust, to share their stories. The chapters focus on many aspects of living with a minor attraction.

The first chapter discusses identity formation. MAPS themselves often share the negative views held by society about minor attraction and struggle to integrate their own sexual interest into their identity. Many of them questioning, “Am I a Monster” which is a question I have heard in my office many times.

The book continues to address the effect of societal shame on MAPS.

Many people, due to stigma, feel that they have to live a dual life and never disclose their minor attraction. They fear rejection from family, partners, loved ones, friends and society at large. Unfortunately, this fear is not unfounded as many also do experience that rejection.

Often this living a dual life can lead to depression, anxiety, or even suicidal thoughts for some.

Preparing a sentencing report for a minor attracted person? Get the data you need, quickly, with Mitigation Aide.

Strategies for Coping

Subsequent chapters deal with the strategies they use to cope with their own attractions as well as to refrain from sexual offending. Many MAPS acknowledge an attraction to children but do not have a desire to physically act on those attractions. This goes against a societal assumption. As the book states, we don’t assume all adult attracted people are walking around actively thinking about raping other adults so why do we think this about minor attracted people?

However, the reality cannot be ignored that some MAPS do, in fact, not resist these urges and sexually abuse children. The book also discusses what strategies some of the individuals use to avoid engaging in any type of contact sexual offense.

Medical Professional Reactions

Another book chapter discusses MAP’s experiences with mental health professionals.

This chapter is upsetting to me as a mental health professional but an expression of reality. People avoid seeking therapy to help cope with the attraction, stigma, shame, or other mental health issues around the minor attraction for many reasons.

They fear, rightly, that many therapists will have a negative reaction to their disclosure and will refuse to treat them. They often fear that a therapist will make an unwarranted call to children and youth, or the police based on the disclosure of an attraction, not based on any behavior. While some might think this is farfetched, I have experienced this in my own practice, hearing of other therapists thinking they need to make a mandatory report when a client says they have an attraction to minors but never disclosed any behavior in that direction.

A final concern for some MAPS that keeps them from treatment is the fear that a therapist might try to engage in a sexual orientation change experience. Basically, the minor attraction equivalent of conversion therapy. We know that we cannot change sexual attractions, and many consider SOCE to be inhumane or unethical.

Learn more about Primary Prevention and its benefits in these articles:

Final Thoughts

The plea to reduce stigma against individuals who are attracted to minors is twofold.

The one that comes to mind first for many is to help with primary prevention. For those MAPS who do struggle with urges to act on their desires, providing safe spaces to work through these urges and work on resilience techniques can help keep a child safe as well as keep the person from engaging in a behavior that everyone knows is not appropriate.

The main reason to reduce stigma, particularly by therapists, is that MAPs are people.

They are just as deserving of a safe place to work through their issues with depression, anxiety, stigma, grief, and loss, etc. as the rest of us. They deserve a safe space and a nonjudgmental professional to work with that can help them improve their general health and wellbeing.

If you have an interest in this topic, I strongly urge you to read this book. I will be incorporating it into our treatment program for those individuals who are minor attracted.

I don’t want to make this disclaimer but given the nature of our world and the internet, I feel that I need to say that supporting Dr. Walker, this book, and the reduction of stigma against minor attraction in no way supports harming children.

It actually supports working to prevent child abuse.

This post contains affiliate links. The author or blog owner may earn a commission if you make a purchase using these links.

Have you found yourself in legal trouble due to your sexual behavior? Seek assistance before the court mandates it, with Sexual Addiction Treatment Services.

Do you feel your sexual behavior, or that of someone you love, is out of control? Then you should consult with a professional.

The post You Are Not a Monster: Review of A Long Dark Shadow first appeared on Dr. Jen's Recovery Readings.

Do Minor Attracted Persons Make Your Skin Crawl?

Dr. Jennifer Weeks — Wed, 13 Nov 2019 13:20:01 +0000

What are Minor Attracted Persons (MAPs)? Let’s talk about the things that make us uncomfortable and learn in the process.

There were many research presentations this year at the ATSA conference relating to MAPs.

This was great to see! From a scientific perspective, we just don’t know much about the MAP community. Therefore, we don’t know about their needs or how to help those who seek it.

What are Minor Attracted Persons?

Very few people are aware of the term. MAP is the acronym for a Minor Attracted Persons.

As a therapist I need to be specific, although the media tends to lump everyone into a single category.

Pedophilia – the name for the attraction to prepubescent children (typically 12 and under). We use this for diagnosis, DSM-V, and research purposes.
Hebephilia – the name for the attraction to pubescent children (not pre- or post- pubescent; typically 13-17 year olds). Again, we tend to use this term for diagnosis, not in the DSM-V, and research purposes.
MAP – Minor Attracted Persons. A non-diagnostic umbrella term for a person who is attracted to children. There is no specific age nor pubertal status associated with this label.

The Minor Attracted Persons Debate

There are some people who do not like the Minor Attracted Persons (MAP) moniker.

I have heard these arguments from people in both research and supervision. The argument loosely goes like this:

“The MAP label is not descriptive enough.”

“It lumps all minors together and does not distinguish between prepubescent, pubescent, and post-pubescent attraction.”

I understand these arguments when it comes to research. There is not enough scientific research in the community looking at any type of attraction to minors.

To lump pedophilia and hebephilia together for research purposes assumes that there are no differences between people who have these attractions.

While this may be the case, due to lack of research, we just don’t know. It is better to look at these groups separately until we can definitively say they are similar enough to put in the same research subject category.

Preparing a sentencing report for a minor attracted person? Get the data you need, quickly, with Mitigation Aide.

Treatment Providers

I am neither a MAP, nor a researcher. I am a treatment provider.

If someone has engaged in sexual offenses, it’s imperative to know their arousal template. It allows us to help them manage unwanted or illegal behavior.

However, I will argue, once we’ve made the diagnosis, we no longer need to continue to use the pedophile language, particularly with our clients.

Why do we need a different term?

I am going to make an assumption, based on my work with clients, that the main reason to use the term Minor Attracted Persons is due to shame and stigma.

The general public, fueled by sensationalist media, equate pedophile with child molester.

There is an assumption made that someone who is attracted to children either has or will eventually sexually offend with a child.

Bluntly, this is not true. Attraction is not a behavior.

While pedophilia and sexual offending are related, they are not synonymous. The label of pedophile is stigmatizing. There is no way around that truth.

Stay up-to-date with all of Dr. Jen’s work through her practice’s newsletter!

Shame, Stigma, and Minor Attracted Persons

I recently learned of the work of Braithwaite (1989) and how this researcher classified shame.

Braithwaite argued that there were two types of shame, reintegrative and disintegrative:

“Reintegrative shaming is temporary, used to communicate censure to an individual, but ultimately aimed at correcting a person’s behavior and, for offenders, reintegrating them back into the community. Disintegrative shaming is a more permanent and reoccurring shame, resulting in a master status that encourages stigmatization and breaks the bond between the person and the community (Bailey & Klein, 2018)”

I learned of this work when researching the effects of the sex offender registry on the people who have to register.

Reducing Shame as Primary Prevention

In the public’s eyes attraction to children equals child molesting. Therefore, those who are attracted to children get put in this category without ever hurting anyone.

If they come forward for treatment or talk about their attraction to family or friends they can face the disintegrative shame that encourages stigmatization.

Research Relating to Minor Attracted Persons

Levenson and Grady (2019) recently published work where they spoke to MAPs about their experiences. Specifically, this study looked at people seeking help for their attraction.

The subjects of this study reported that they often felt isolated and alone with their feelings.

They also experienced feelings of shame, fear and expected to be misunderstood by people, including therapists.

Particularly distressing was finding that therapists wanted to “cure” the minor attraction. However, the client wanted to work on concerns such as depression or loneliness and not specifically their minor attraction.

Learn more about Primary Prevention and its benefits in these articles:

Back to the Beginning: Why Terminology Matters

From a person centered, trauma informed perspective, we should be using appropriate terms rather than potentially increasing shame and isolation.

From a public education standpoint, I would like to see the term de-coupled from people who sexually offend against children.

Misuse of the term pedophile is one of my soap boxes. I will forever argue about semantics and how the word is used. I’m tired of the media misusing the word and equating it to child sexual abuse.

I challenge you to think about these issues for yourself:

Can you accept that some people are attracted to children?

Can you accept that it’s not a choice?

Will you decry the assumption that every person who is attracted to children is going to offend?

To end, I will leave you with something heard more than frequently in graduate school.

Correlation is not causation.

References: Bailey, D.J.S. & Klein, J.L. (2018). Ashamed and Alone: Comparing offender and family member experiences with the sex offender registry. Criminal Justice Review, 43(4), 440-457. Braithwaite, J. (1989). Crime, Shame and Reintegration. Cambridge, England, Cambridge University. Levinson, J.S. & Grady, M.D. (2019). Preventing sexual abuse: Perspectives of Minor Attracted Persons About Seeking Help. Sexual Abuse, 31(8), 991-1013.

Are you looking for more reputable data-backed information on sexual addiction? The Mitigation Aide Research Archive is an excellent source for executive summaries of research studies.

Have you found yourself in legal trouble due to your sexual behavior? Seek assistance before the court mandates it, with Sexual Addiction Treatment Services.

Do you feel your sexual behavior, or that of someone you love, is out of control? Consult with a professional.

The post Do Minor Attracted Persons Make Your Skin Crawl? first appeared on Dr. Jen's Recovery Readings.

Pedophilia is Not a Behavior

Dr. Jennifer Weeks — Wed, 06 Nov 2019 13:07:17 +0000

It’s easy to tell when a bit of science about pedophilia is brought out to the general public. There is usually a rash of negative memes. Usually it’s implied, by agreeing with the emerging science, the writers or researchers are condoning the sexual abuse of children.

Recently, Dr. James Cantor, a highly respected and published researcher who focuses on the study of pedophilia, appeared on an Australian news show to discuss his findings.

He shared his research, which involves brain scans and neuroscience and shows the fascinating differences people have in their brain structures. Furthermore, it suggests people with pedophilia are born with this attraction. Therefore, it’s not something they can change.

What is Pedophilia?

Enter the memes and where I get on my soapbox and continue to spout science and education.

I have written about this topic before because it is something that I feel strongly about. I feel very strongly about it being accurately portrayed in the lay community.

Pedophilia is a sexual arousal to a person who is prepubescent; the age is not the important thing. However, what is important is the attraction is to a child’s body that has NOT started the physiological changes associated with puberty.

If a person is attracted to pubescent or post pubescent children, that is considered hebephilia.

What isn’t Pedophilia?

Pedophilia is NOT a behavior.

I believe that this is one of the most common myths in the non-scientific community.

Pedophilia is an attraction. Actions are behavior.

The frequently cited concern is that every person who has a pedophilic arousal template is a child molester.

Not true.

Stay up-to-date with all of Dr. Jen’s work through her practice’s newsletter!

Why do People Offend Against Children?

Some people sexually abuse children because they are attracted to them.

Some people sexually abuse children for reasons that don’t have much to do with sexual attraction.

For example: issues of power and control, distorted thinking, emotionally connecting with children in an inappropriate manner that becomes sexualized.

Some people who are attracted to children never engage in any sexual contact with them, nor do they view images of child sexual abuse material (CSAM).

Are you a Licensed Professional Counselor in need of continuing education? Learn more about Sex Addiction, Erotic Conflict, and Moral Incongruence from Dr. Weeks and Sexual Addiction Treatment Services, an NBCC ACEP™ approved provider!

Sexual Addiction Treatment Services has been approved by NBCC as an Approved Continuing Education Provider, ACEP No. 7250. Programs that do not qualify for NBCC credit are clearly identified. Sexual Addiction Treatment Services is solely responsible for all aspects of the programs.

Why am I Lecturing About Pedophiles?

Why do I think it’s important?

When you get it wrong, when the press gets it wrong, it damages prevention efforts.

Every person who is attracted to children, whether they have offended or not, knows how society feels about them.

Most carry an immense amount of toxic shame. This shame keeps them from coming forward to seek help from trained professionals. Sadly, there are treatment professionals who also engage in this stigma.

We fail to protect children every time a Minor Attracted Person feels they can’t seek treatment.

We need to do a better job protecting children as a society. Therefore, treatment needs to be accessible for those who have not offended.

Learn more about Primary Prevention and its benefits in these articles:

Primary Prevention vs. Secondary Prevention of Pedophilia

The United States does a good job of secondary prevention.

Once we know you have offended and found guilty, you are mandated to treatment to prevent another offense. We try really hard to make sure you don’t offend AGAIN. We focus on decreasing recidivism, but it misses the mark.

I would much prefer to live in a world where there are no more first victims, not just no more subsequent victims.

Pedophilia ≠ Child Molestation

Pedophilia is an attraction.

Child molestation is a behavior.

They are not synonymous.

Do you feel your sexual behavior, or that of someone you love, is out of control? Consult with a professional.

Have you found yourself in legal trouble due to your sexual behavior? Seek assistance before the court mandates it, with Sexual Addiction Treatment Services.

Preparing a sentencing report for a minor attracted person? Get the data you need, quickly, with Mitigation Aide.

The post Pedophilia is Not a Behavior first appeared on Dr. Jen's Recovery Readings.

You’re Being Investigated for a Cybersex Crime: What to look for in an Attorney

Dr. Jennifer Weeks — Mon, 25 Jun 2018 13:55:56 +0000

First, here is my proviso and you will hear it a lot. I am NOT AN ATTORNEY. I am not writing this in any way as a form of legal advice. That’s not my role. My role is to help people advocate for themselves and find the criminal defense attorney that is the best fit for their needs.

If you have had a visit from some type of law enforcement and they told you that you are now under investigation, you need an attorney. Most people do not have a criminal defense attorney on speed dial so you, or a family member or loved one, are likely frantically trying to figure out several things. First, what attorney do you use and second, how the heck are you going to pay for it?

What do you need to look for in an attorney?

You need an attorney who has experience with sex crimes. Many criminal defense attorneys spend their entire careers mostly working with DUI type cases. They don’t all work with sex crimes. If you are searching attorney websites, they should state on the site that they have defended sex crimes. If their website does not state this specifically, if you call, you need to ask whether or not they have experience with sex crimes. And by experience I don’t mean they have tried one or two cases. I mean that they have worked on many sex crime cases and know all about the laws and how to help mitigate your sentence.

You need an attorney who has experience with sex crimes in your jurisdiction. This means a few things. First, they obviously need to have passed the bar and are approved to practice law in your state. Second, they need to have experience in the court where your case will be seen. What court your case will be in depends on who showed up at your door. If the FBI or Homeland Security is investigating you, you need a defense attorney who has experience trying sex crimes in the federal court system. The federal courts and county courts handle these cases differently. There are nuances in the Federal System that someone who has not seen cases in that venue will not know. If your case is a county case, you want an attorney who has worked on a number of cases in your county. Part of this process is the relationship that your attorney has with the prosecutor.

You need an attorney with a strategy. When you are interviewing attorneys, you want to know what type of strategy they propose for your case. At this point, they will not be able to create an actual solid plan as they do not know the details and will not know until the discovery is provided by the prosecution. However, they should still have an idea of how to proceed and give you some things that you can do now to help with the case.

You need an attorney with good reviews. Just like a doctor or a restaurant, there are sites that will help you find a lawyer and also will give you information on the lawyers rating. For example, you can go on avvo.com to find a criminal defense attorney and read client ratings. The website www.superlawyer.com can help you find a criminal defense attorney with a good track record and good ratings.

In the legal process, the decision about what attorney to use is so important. I cannot understate how critical it is to have an attorney with experience specific to cybersex crimes. Do not choose rashly or lightly. Take some time. Talk to the attorney. Do some research. Any attorney is going to be expensive. The price tag will likely be daunting. If you have any ability to find the money for an attorney, it is my suggestion that you go for it. If you cannot afford an attorney and have to use a public defender, your defense will not be nearly as customized, and you will have to do a lot of this work yourself.

The next article in our series will discuss the psychosexual evaluation.

Dr. Weeks is a forensic psychologist who specializes in the evaluation and treatment of cybersex offenders. Her treatment program provides counseling both pre-trial and after adjudication and she provides expert witness testimony.

The post You’re Being Investigated for a Cybersex Crime: What to look for in an Attorney first appeared on Dr. Jen's Recovery Readings.

You’re Being Investigated for a Cybersex Crime: Now What?

Dr. Jennifer Weeks — Wed, 20 Jun 2018 02:26:56 +0000

If you are reading this blog, either you or someone you care about has recently been visited by the police and are under investigation for a cybersex crime. You are likely in shock and are likely panicking. After many years of working with people in this situation, I have learned a thing or two of what to do next. Even though you might be panicked, immobilized, in shock or depressed, you must take action.

Here is what you need to do right away.

Hire an attorney

If you have the money or can rustle up the money, you need to immediately hire an attorney. I will talk about what to look for in an attorney in a later post. What you need to know in these first moments is that you should not just hire the first attorney you talk to. Talk to several criminal defense attorneys. Find out how much experience they have working with cybersex cases. Make sure that the attorney has experience working with cybersex cases at your level. If the FBI is investigating you, you need an attorney who has experience in Federal Court. If you cannot afford to hire an attorney, you are going to have to be your own advocate during this process. A court appointed attorney won’t have the time to give you what a private attorney will. You will have to do some of the leg work yourself.

Make sure you are safe

When I say make sure you are safe, I mean make sure you are emotionally safe. People who are investigated for cybersex crimes frequently feel immediately suicidal. The majority of cybersex offenders have never been in trouble with the law before and the entire process can cause a shame spiral. If you feel suicidal, go to the emergency room or find a hospital where you can go for a few days to ensure your emotional health and well-being. If you are the loved one of someone who is under investigation be aware that they may be experiencing suicidal thoughts.

Find a therapist

Now is not the time to just go down the list of in-network treatment providers from your insurance. You don’t just need a therapist, you need a specialist. The therapist you see should have experience treating people in your exact situation. They should have experience treating sexual offenders and perhaps pornography addicts. While many therapists might be able to help you work through the anxiety and depression that will occur related to the investigation, if they don’t have experience working with the specific sexual behaviors or the court process, they will not be as effective as someone who specializes.

The criminal justice system works at a rather slow pace. You will have time to deal with all of what comes after the investigation. I will address many of these things in further posts.

If you are newly investigated please do things now and start to let experienced professionals help you through this process.

Dr. Jennifer Weeks is a Clinically Certified Sex Offender Treatment Specialist and an expert witness in the areas of sexual offending, cybersex offending and sexual addiction. For more information on her services please go to the Sexual Addiction Treatment Services website.

The post You’re Being Investigated for a Cybersex Crime: Now What? first appeared on Dr. Jen's Recovery Readings.

Pedophile: What’s in a Label?

Dr. Jennifer Weeks — Wed, 15 Nov 2017 06:42:55 +0000

The news is awash with reports of famous men, actors, directors, and politicians whose victims are coming forward to report the sexual abuse and sexual harassment they have been subject to at the hands of these people. I applaud the bravery of each and every victim who has come forward to share their painful story. It takes an immense amount of courage to break through years of shame and silence to confront one’s abuser. Bravo. I am glad that these men and women’s voices are being heard and hopefully they can find some sort of justice or closure.

My writing today is not for those brave men and women but for the media. As someone works with sex offenders every day I have a pet peeve. That pet peeve, which sometimes gets me in hot water in facebook posts, is the fact that people throw around the word pedophile every time someone is found to have abused a minor. Besides frequently being inaccurate, it sends a message that pedophiles are the only people who abuse children. It generates fear. If we are truly going to protect children from sexual abuse by adults, we need to spread accurate information and create effective prevention plans.

So, let’s talk about attraction. When we specifically are looking at age, attraction is clinically categorized three ways.

Pedophile: A person who is attracted to PRE-PUBSECENT children. Doesn’t matter the gender of the child. The attraction is to the lack of sexual development.

Hebephile: A person who is attracted to pubescent children. Again, gender does not matter. The attraction is to a child who is in early adolescence and has signs of sexual development.

Teleiophile: A person who is attracted to adults. This attraction is to fully sexually developed adults.

A person does not have to fit into just one category. There are people who are what we call fixed pedophiles. This means they are only attracted to pre-pubescent children. Other people are attracted to several categories of sexual development. I work with many men who are attracted to pre-pubescent children, pubescent minors AND adults. They do not have a fixed attraction but find all ages of people to be sexually arousing.

The next piece of this puzzle is that ATTRACTION DOES NOT EQUAL ACTION. Many people who have a pedophilic or hebephilic attraction do not ever have any sexual contact with minors. They live with this attraction but have the awareness to know that they cannot act on these urges and they can inhibit any behavior toward minors to whom they may be attracted. In the clinical world, we call these folks non-offending pedophiles.

In Germany, there is a great program called Project Dunkelfeld that offers free treatment to any person who identifies as attracted to minors to help ensure they do not act on those attractions. This project runs ads on buses or billboards and runs public service announcements on television. These folks are getting prevention right.

The next piece of the abuse puzzle is that people offend against children for many reasons, only one of which may be sexual attraction. There are many, many reasons why adults sexually abuse children. There are too many to go into here (future post on this topic forthcoming). Only one of the reasons a person sexually abuses a child is attraction. I have worked with many contact sexual offenders against children who were not sexually aroused to children. This may make no sense at all to someone who doesn’t work in this field, but it is true. Why else might someone abuse a child? Power, control, emotional identification with children, using a child as replacement spouse (frequently seen in incest), and/or antisociality to name a few.

As I am sitting here writing this, I am trying to determine why the misuse of the term pedophile pokes my buttons. I think that if we throw around the term pedophile to label anyone who sexually abuses a child we can put them in a metaphorical box. It makes it easy to put abusers into a category and then not think about it as much. We can think, “oh watch out for pedophiles, they abuse children”. Even if it were true, how do you identify one? They look just like you and me and act just like you and me. There is no way to know someone’s sexual preference by looking at them. Labeling gives people a false sense of security that children are abused by people in this category and not by anyone else.

If we put child molesters in this lump category we diminish the complexity of the issue. It is not just about attraction to minors. The people perpetrating the abuse most often are not “the others.” They are most frequently family members or close friends of the family of the children. They are frequently people in positions of power who have the trust of the child and the child’s parents. Abusers are, most often, people that know you and your child. (the exception here being cyber cases).

If we are going to truly protect children from sexual abuse, we need to make sure that everyone has accurate information. Creating a fear reaction to a clinical label does nothing to enhance child safety. What can you do to enhance your child’s safety? Learn the truth about the perpetrators of sexual abuse. Create an open and safe relationship with your child so that you can talk to them about sex, sexuality, sexual boundaries. Learn what grooming is and help them to identify behaviors that make them feel uncomfortable, so they can come to you immediately. Arm yourself with knowledge, not fear.

Dr. Jennifer Weeks is the owner and director of SATS, an out-patient program that treats sexual offenders, problematic sexual behavior and trauma.

Her book The New Age of Sex Education: How to talk to your teen about pornography and cybersex in the digital age is available on amazon.

The post Pedophile: What’s in a Label? first appeared on Dr. Jen's Recovery Readings.